The women than choose to become surrogates are fully aware of how beautiful of a gift surrogacy is, which is why they’re able to overlook the physical changes and challenges that they’ll be facing for the next nine months. Even so, this time is highly emotional and can be a lot to handle for all parties involved.
One of the many questions that we, Lotus Eilte, are asked is how intended parents and the family of the surrogate can help during the pregnancy. Given that we’ve gone through this a time or two, we know countless ways that you can make a difference in the comfort of your surrogate and the ease with which they go through their pregnancy.
Check In with Her
Something that is quick and easy but goes a long way is checking in. Pregnancy is not an easy thing, which is exactly why asking your surrogate how they’re doing and sending them a quick text or giving them a call can make a huge difference. This also gives you an opportunity to ask if there’s anything specific that they need help with. If they are able to give you an answer right then and there, taking care of your surrogate proactively just became a whole lot easier!
Offer to Help with the Kids
Many surrogates have children of their own, and while they love them more than anything on this planet, they can make a pregnancy just a touch more difficult. If the surrogate that you’re working with has children, offering to help with the kids is a major blessing. Whether you’re wanting to pick them up from school, stop by and help with homework, or you simply offer to babysit while mom runs some errands, this act won’t go unnoticed or unappreciated.
Help With Meals
Eating is something that every pregnant woman needs to do. Not only is it completely necessary for them to fuel their bodies for the pregnancy, but it’s also crucial to the health of the baby. With that being said, cooking healthy, hearty meals can be time consuming. After a long day of work or watching children, preparing a meal may be the very last thing that your surrogate wants to do. This is why helping with meals can make all the difference!
Now, when we say help with preparing meals, you’re definitely going to want to talk to your surrogate beforehand for any allergies, sensitivities, or plain old cravings. This is something you can guarantee they’ll be thankful for.
If you’re not a wizard in the kitchen or you aren’t entirely sure what types of meals to prepare for your surrogate, consider just grabbing them a few staple groceries. Picking up items like milk, bread, and meat for them to have in the fridge can make preparing a quality meal so much easier. Alongside that, if you know you’re going to be heading to the grocery store either way, you can always ask them if there’s anything specific that they’d like picked up from the store. Now you’re saving them time and you’re giving them food that they’re excited to eat.
Help Her Relax
Between the high hormones and the body doing whatever it feels like, it can be difficult for a pregnant woman to relax. If you really want to give her something that she can treasure, a little bit of time to relax can make a world of difference for a surrogate. Now, this looks different for each surrogate, which can make helping her do so fun and personal!
At times, just volunteering to babysit their kids so that they have some time to take a shower or get a nap can be more than enough of a gift. Other times, sending your surrogate off to a day at the spa where they can enjoy a maternity massage to help with those aches and pains can be life changing. I’ve you’re not sure how your surrogate likes to relax or what they’d prefer, simply ask them! We’re sure they’ll come out with it almost immediately.
Tidy Up Around the House
Another thing that just about all of us appreciate is some help around the house. It’s pretty incredible just how messy a house can get in such a short amount of time, and when your body is rapidly changing, spending time cleaning is not exactly how you want to spend your time. Whether you go over and help with little things like laundry, washing the dishes, or taking trash out, you can guarantee your surrogate will appreciate having a clean house.
Spend Time Together
As simple as this may seem, taking care of your surrogate doesn’t have to be over-the-top or difficult. By spending a little bit of time together you can get a good idea of how she’s doing and what she needs. Aside from that, you get the opportunity to get to know her better! Whether you go out for a meal or you stay in with a movie and popcorn, this is a fun way to let her know that she has someone during this time.
Ask Our Team for Help
Lotus Eilte strive to ensure that the surrogate, intended parents, and baby are all taken care of throughout this process. If you’re looking for additional ways that you can nurture and assist your surrogate during this time, ask our team! We have been helping families and surrogates through this process for years, and we can definitely help you come up with some ideas.
For more information on the surrogate process or to brainstorm some ideas on how you can care for your surrogate, contact our office. We would be more than happy to help.